That magical quote is compliments of Bambi when discussing the perils of the pierced ear. Surprisingly she was being serious and unsurprisingly, everyone else's mind was in the gutter.
The moment I graced the ladies with my sweaty disgusting presence tonight, I was whisked away (2 feet away) to the table, seated and fed chicken. Rita later force-fed broccoli to me like a caring but sneaky mother. Just to make sure I finished the last big piece she ate the smaller one while making "yummy" noises. Then I was charged the member price for dinner. I met a new lady tonight by the name of Brittany, I think. She's the first Black dresser I've met in this group and is a musician who tours a lot. Didn't recognize her but we hit it off immediately. I snapped her picture like a celebrity and eventually, she got used to it. By this time I've definitely become as much one of them as an outsider can be.
Tonight we received the announcement that one of our members is now going by her chosen middle name which was an interesting concept. Like a re-coming out. Welcome home, Bonnie. I believe she's going the distance with transitioning so it will be interesting to see if she continues to come around afterwards.
Tonight's festivities was topped with another cake, this time to say goodbye to Wren who got a wonderful university teaching job in North Dakota. I shared the couch with Amy's wife as we gabbed about fried food and the Chinatown bus. There was much talk of travel and camping experiences. Brittany was so into our food conversation she said someone could've come over and stole her wallet and she never woulda known. Cause, well, we're talkin about food! Fried spaghetti and high cholesterol. Mmm mmm good. I tell you, the humor these people have....it's like an age old friend reunion every time. Chock full of anecdotes and recipes.
At the opening of my show at PEP Gallery in Brooklyn Bambi asked if she could have a copy of her portrait. Of course I agreed but didn't know that I had captured a milestone. That was her last portrait before the face lift. I didn't know about the surgery until she told me tonight. I thought she was kidding. Not so much. She looks fantastic. While at the tavern tonight we continued the conversation about it. Today she had her first botox injection as well. I asked if she went through with these reconstructions because of age or beauty. (Granted, she's a beautiful older woman and looks younger than I'm sure she already is. I don't know her age.) She said they come hand in hand. That she would do anything to go back to when she was 25. That she's making up for lost time. She's only been dressing publicly for a little over 10 years, privately since puberty. She doesn't feel the need to transition fully because I think she's gotten used to who she is throughout the years of having no model for what a transitioned woman lives like. Realizing this about herself when she was wee was so painful that to further complicate it was out of the question. She has the acceptance of her loved ones and coworkers. She's alright. Bambi then told me that when she was dressing in private, she'd go to the department store to get her outfit and shoes, all her everything. She'd go home and get all dolled up, makeup and all but wouldn't shave her mustache. She even had long hair then. She thought no one would know her secret if she kept her mustache. This concept had me perplexed at first but she explained to me that in her head, if people saw her with long hair and no facial hair that they'd assume she wanted to be a woman. From my own experiences I can understand that mindset so she didn't have to explain to me that logically, if the public isn't looking for differences, they won't notice...but for people like us, every detail matters.
